Suppose someone approaches you with a question: “How do Americans behave?” You might be stumped to come up with an answer. Are they talking about the Americans at a hip-hop concert — or a group of farmers in Iowa?

Yet many business books make it sound as if it’s as simple as pie (apple, of course) to figure out how people from other countries behave. The books have described how you can work with Japanese people, for example — offering a cheat sheet of notes about Japanese culture, plus rules of thumb for interacting with them.

“These rules of thumb just aren’t very good,” warns David Thomas, a professor of international management at Simon Fraser University in Vancouver, British Columbia, and co-author of “Cultural Intelligence: People Skills for Global Business” (Berrett-Koehler). In their book, Thomas and Kerr Inkson explain how importance it is to look for behavioral cues that will help you understand why someone from another culture is acting in a particular way.

Too often people think that if they know the rules of thumb, they can ignore how people are acting, Thomas said in an interview. “We go about our daily lives in sort of semi-automatic mode most of the time.”

Thomas said it certainly helps to understand what is important in different cultures, but you have to realize that there are millions of exceptions to any rules you come across. Suppose you’re introduced to a Japanese businessman, and you assume that he will fit the “formal and reserved” rule of thumb. But then he greets you cordially and shakes your hand. If you don’t understand that he doesn’t fit the stereotype, it would be easy for you to come across as a stiff.

Thomas said that in too many instances, people will notice someone behaving in a different way and automatically think the person is wrong, rather than just different. How many times have you heard American people say that the British drive on the “wrong” side of the road — instead of the “left” side?

“Why might that person be behaving like that?” Thomas suggests that you ask yourself. “Could it be a cultural thing?”

Don’t exclude the possibility that cultural differences exist just because you’re in your home office, Thomas said. “We’re sensitized to cultural differences when someone looks different from us or we’re in another country,” he said. “But even if somebody looks like you and talks like you, it doesn’t mean they have the same attitudes.”

If a longtime co-worker behaves in a way you don’t expect, you might not even consider the possibility that it could be a cultural difference. You’re so used to the person being like you that you overlook any cultural roles.

“Many of these (differences) tend to be buried in the day-to-day organizational lives of people,” Thomas said. “Culture isn’t really the most significant driver of behavior. The situation is.”

He said it’s crucial to look for visual cues, not simply listen to whatever words are being said. What are people saying through their actions and gestures?

If you’re confused, trying to clear things up by asking questions might not help. Thomas said that although Israelis are generally comfortable with direct questions, for example, many Chinese would feel awkward getting involved in such blunt discussions.

As with any rule of thumb, though, there are plenty of exceptions. Thomas said that’s why it is important to have bicultural contacts, who might be able to explain how to handle awkward situations — and could tell you whether a behavior could be because of the culture or simply because of an individual’s attitudes.

Thomas stressed that workers shouldn’t automatically change their behavior to fit the other person’s culture. But if they are aware of what differences exist, they can work with the other person so that both can adapt.

Suppose you face a tight deadline, and the other person comes from a culture that prefers building long-term relationships, wanting to socialize for days before discussing business. Without some sort of understanding, you can come across as abrupt, and the other person as reluctant.